albertmcwilliams’s posterous

a bit iffy at times, but generally a good idea

National Youth Literacy Day

Today (August 26th) is National Youth Literacy Day. While this does mean reading, I think more importantly it means writing. Growing up with the ability to communicate your thoughts, creative or otherwise, to others in a way that they will understand is of unparalleled value. 

I promise I'll get back to abusing my ability to formulate thoughts soon on this blog, but for today it's all about National Youth Literacy Day.

the 826 Writing Centers are having a big push for the holiday - you can donate $8.26 on 8/26 by texting "WRITE" to 20222 or just head to http://826on826.org and use paypal.

Also, hey, get off your dicks and spread the word. Today only!

Yahooooo...ahhch..gcahn... guahsdgn

A colleague sent me this, and it's one of the first honest things I've heard come from the teach-set. I love it.

"By 1998, Yahoo was the beneficiary of a de facto pyramid scheme. Investors were excited about the Internet. One reason they were excited was Yahoo's revenue growth. So they invested in new Internet startups. The startups then used the money to buy ads on Yahoo to get traffic. Which caused yet more revenue growth for Yahoo, and further convinced investors the Internet was worth investing in. When I realized this one day, sitting in my cubicle, I jumped up like Archimedes in his bathtub, except instead of "Eureka!" I was shouting "Sell!""

Suck it, the Delta Airlines.

I just had my very first experience with Delta Airlines customer service since the merger. First, the new website gave me trouble... I eventually booked my tickets despite the lack of proper tab-field navigation. Seriously, who doesn't map their tabs right on a form? You're a multi-billion dollar company and you're not even to the level of the fine, dragon-statue-peddling, folks at MedievalCollectibles.com.

Now, Delta rocks the wide-body from DTW - LAX and had put me in Seat D. You know, seat D-eadmiddle. Seat D-ont-even-try-to-use-an-arm-rest. Seat D-ya-mind-if-my-three-year-old-watches-daddy-day-care-on-your-laptop?. In other words, I decided to use some miles to upgrade... which, of course, Delta's website doesn't do (Northwest's had a handy "click to use miles to upgrade" button).

So I called Delta... 

Debbie: "Hi, this is Debbie Thank you for calling Detla"
This guy: "Hi Debbie, I just booked a flight and I'd like to use SkyMiles to upgrade"
Debbie: "Okay, well, you can't upgrade the way back. You'd have to pay a $150 change fee."
This Guy: "huh?"
Debbie: "You booked them wrong."
This guy: "What? Wrong? I just booked them on your website, what other way is there?"
Debbie: "Well, on the way back you booked and L ticket. You're fine on the way there, you booked K class, but the L class doesn't upgrade."
This Guy: "uhm... so, how was I supposed to know that?"
Debbie: "You weren't. You don't work here. There's no way for you to know that."
This Guy: "ooookay so..."
Debbie: "I can't even refund them because you didn't book them today."
This Guy: "wait, what? I booked them literally 10 minutes ago."
Debbie: "Oh... hold on."
Debbie: "Okay, I cancelled your tickets you'll be refunded in a few days."
This Guy: "WAIT WHAT?! I don't have tickets anymore?"
Debbie: "Just go on the website and start over and book K class."
This Guy: "huh? How do I know they're K Class? Will the website let me search only K tickets?"
Debbie: "no, it won't."
This Guy: "can I book them through you right now, and then you can upgrade them right away?"
Debbie: "yeah, but it will cost you a $20 direct ticketing fee."
This Guy: "you charge me extra for NOT buying tickets through a distributor?"
Debbie: "yes."
This Guy: "whatever. Do it. Book my tickets. Again. That I just booked and you cancelled. and then upgrade them."

And then punch me in the dick and I'll give you an extra $30.00

NWA Forever (okay, Eazy-E too... but mostly NorthWest Airlines).

People I Don't Wanna Be: Employment Edition

Which would you rather do...

or

of Solar Power, Muscle Cars and Shoddy Calypso

Ann Arbor had to close down Main st. today due to dangerously high levels of irony.

...and Calypso / steel drum lessons... not sure which.

Everyone Loves a "before" shot

Quack!Media has some new studio space that is, well, a little rough around the edges. Imagine the bathroom at Tiger Stadium if a gang  of squatter-punks had moved in and started making ramen in the pee-troughs. I wish I could tell you that the wisdom on the walls makes up for the amount of painting and peeling I'm going to be doing over the next few weeks, but the previous jerks (as opposed to the current jerks) who were using the space weren't terribly original. One young man just wrote his name on everything. Perhaps he felt that writing "was here" after it was redundant. Although, that didn't stop them from writing, "writing on the wall" ... on the wall. Get it.

Enjoy.

.... oh, and SLAYYYERRRR!

**updated** no, don't worry, we're keeping our sweet digs on Main st. ... this is additional space.

           

Mac WIN: the little things

Last week I replaced my aging Macbook Pro with a brand new Macbook Pro. I could go on for scroll-buttons about the crazy-awesome stuff this thing does; honestly, Apple does a phenomenal job at makin' computers.

There is one feature that trumps them all. It seems small, and likely went un-advertised, un-marketed, and the engineer who included it likely didn't even get an extra IZZE at the one-infinite-loop café that day. This feature, however, affects something that I use all day, everyday, and cuts the time it takes to do this task by about 90%. It affects one of the most important things in a professional person's life, and it makes it 90% more efficient. Seriously.

I'm not talking about the stuff they advertise; that stuff is cool, and yes, it does help... but honestly, syncing my mobile calendars, making 10-minute-blogs, and sharing photos doesn't really affect my life all that much, and it certainly doesn't make me better at my job.

The new Mac POP email client v. 4.3 that comes for free with your new Snow Leopard OS.... with one click...

SCRAPES EMAIL SIGNATURES INTO YOUR ADDRESS BOOK.

This may actually run on magic, I'm not sure, but this simple feature is the single most useful improvement to computers that I can think of. Address, phone numbers, emails, no matter how the person formats them, file neatly, and automatically into the proper fields in the Mac addybook. 

So here's to you, un-named Apple engineer. You've changed my life, and all you got was an overpriced apartment in Cupertino.

   

Blame the Economy

This flyer was photographed at Pinkney State Recreation area near Hell, MI (yes, that is a real place) by Zach Curd and he calls it, 

 
"Feelin' safe, at Half Moon Lake"
 
The complexity of awesome we have in this piece is astounding. The Michigan Department of Corrections is concerned enough about the loss of this tether, which is also missing, to risk posting these damning fliers... but only $50 concerned. They don't , however, seem terribly concerned with finding the escaped convict that was once associated with said electronic tether.
 
They do want that tether. The MDOC has even offered some suggestions to help you find it, should you really need that fifty bucks and are cool roaming about the woods with an unspecified felon on the loose. You may try looking by the side of a road, private drive, or alternatively, being used to tie your neck to the dashboard of a getaway car just before your hostage-ass gets capped.
 
The most striking part of this flier is its sincerity, and clear understanding of how to change text color in MSWord. It's quite possible that the associated convict has already been accounted for, and that's why they didn't think twice about posing the flier ... but you think they would have mentioned it. The posters mind didn't go there, so why would anyone else's?
 
As my dad would say, "Only in Michigan."

Fun With Telemarketers: Dunn & Bradstreet

D&B : "Hi, this is Mark [sic] with Dunn and Bradstreet."

Thisguy : "Hi Mark."

Mark: "I'm calling to let you know that we've had inquiries about your company and that your information in our system is not complete."

Thisguy : "oh  yeah?"

Mark: "yes sir. Now, Dunn & Bradstreet is the leading commercial credit agency, and potential customers, clients and vendors rely on our information to make business decisions every day ... (extended sales pitch and explanation of D&B"

Thisguy: "yes, I'm aware of D&B"

Mark: "So, you know how important it is to have your Company's information complete on D&B?"

Thisguy: "Yes, but I'm comfortable with having no information on there, that's on purpose.... what are you selling?"

Mark: "Well, we offer a monitoring service for $300/mo that allows you to make sure the information on you is accurate; otherwise, there could be negative information about you and you'd have no protection against that."

Thisguy: "so, what you're saying, Mark, is that you'd like me to pay D&B $300/mo or else you can't guarantee that something bad won't happen."

Mark: "no, no, no, I'm saying that potential clients or vendors might be getting inaccurate information about your company, and that it could be negative, and they might not want to work with you. For $300/mo you can control it, and protect against inaccurate, negative information."

Thisguy: "so, you're offering me protection."

Mark: "no,  no, this isn't Tony Sorprano stuff, this isn't extortion."

Thisguy: "are you sure?"

Mark: "we simply want to make sure that the information that's out there on your company is as accurate as possible."

Thisguy "so, you want me to pay you $300/mo to make your information on me better, which you then turn around and sell to others. You want me to pay to make your product better?"

Mark: "Well, we take your information and we process it using our special process to make D&B's special credit ratings."

Thisguy: "...ratings that you can't guarantee will be positive... unless I pay you $300/mo."